Hope for Our Hurting World

I've heard people say, "I don't know how so-and-so can suffer through that pain without Christ." What is meant is that the person does not have a living relationship with God through Christ, yet is bearing much pain on his or her own. This admission comes from a heart that has suffered, a heart that has found comfort from God during a stint of emotional and/or psychological pain. The believer has "the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all consolation" to rely upon during distressing times (2 Cor. 1:3 NRSV).

Sadly, often even believers neglect to rely upon the God of all comfort, feeling that God should not be bothered with their pain.

But our God encourages us to invite Him into our pain. He longs for us to look to Him for consolation "in all our affliction, so that we may be able to console those who are in any affliction with the consolation with which we ourselves are consoled by God" (2 Cor. 1:4 NRSV). How shall we ever help others receive God's consolation if we neglect it ourselves?

We also try too hard to deflect our pain, hoping instead for immediate gratification, or a quick-fix recovery. There are no quick-fix recoveries. Recovery takes time, patience, hard work and tenacity; and no one can do the hard work for us: either we apply ourselves to the work or we degenerate. We have also lost the art of healthy and godly grieving. Henri Nouwen explains: 

The hardships we all endure require more than words, of course, even spiritual words. Eloquent phrases cannot soothe our deep pain. But we do find something to lead and guide us through. We hear an invitation to allow our mourning to become a place of healing, and our sadness a way through pain to dancing. Who is it Jesus said would be blessed? "Those who mourn" (Matt. 5:4).¹ 

We, as believers in and followers of Christ, may not "grieve as others do who have no hope" (1 Thess. 4:13), but we do grieve, nonetheless. The "American way" has historically been to "pull ourselves up by our bootstraps," keeping a "stiff upper lip," for "God helps those who help themselves." The Bible contradicts this false way. We are helpless and, hence, cannot pull ourselves up. We need God to pull us up. Our upper lip should not remain stiff but pliable in asking God for help. God does not help those who help themselves, but only helps those who cannot help themselves, lest we think that He is the one who needs our help. Again, Nouwen writes:    

We learn to look fully into our losses [grieving our losses], not evade them. By greeting life's pains with something other than denial we may find something unexpected. By inviting God into our difficulties we ground life -- even its sad moments -- in joy and hope. When we stop grasping our lives we can finally be given more than we could ever grab for ourselves. And we learn the way to a deeper love for others.²

Peter commanded us to cast all our anxieties and worries and cares upon God because He cares for us (1 Pet. 5:7). "Cast your burden on the LORD," writes the Psalmist, "and he will sustain you" (Ps. 55:22). When we carry what we were never meant to carry, we become an emotional danger to ourselves, as well as to those around us. This is why one often hears a believer confess to his or her perplexity of a non-believer enduring suffering apart from Christ. Pain and suffering are difficult to bear with Him, let alone without Him. Jesus is the only hope for our hurting world. Many have walked away from the faith by neglecting to rely upon the only hope for our hurting world.
     

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¹ Henri J.M. Nouwen, Turning My Mourning into Dancing: Finding Hope in Hard Times (Nashville: W Publishing Group, 2001), xv.

² Ibid. 

Written by William Birch, reposted with permission.

Ashes Like Snow

Can a house burn up while it's burning down?
This fire has taken up more than half the town

I calm myself down - I say a prayer
When I breathe, I can taste the smoke in the air

Black orangish clouds creep across the whole sky
The wind blows too fast, too hot, and too dry

Fear grips my chest - smoke - I can't breathe anymore
The world starts to spin, as, I sink to the floor

"All I hold dear is gone now" I cry
As ashes fall softly like snow from the sky

__________________________________________

It's wintertime here, and Christmas is coming
With holiday songs about drummer boys drumming

I hear jingling bells and see Christmas decor
Kind people wrap presents to give to the poor

Wreaths and holly will hang from each door
Fresh gingerbread man - and the children want more

The gift that I bought her, pies that I would bake
When it comes to mind, my heart starts to break

Something Christmas is missing, I'm not going to lie
I ask for a white Christmas, and what's the reply?
Just ashes falling like snow from the sky

__________________________________________

To buy me that house, I saved all my life
That house was a home, not one bit of strife

I gave up my todays for her tomorrows
I gave her a home to protect her from sorrows

Up in the hills, where the weather is drier
Our house was one of the first to catch fire

The firemen tell me beyond a doubt
That my girl didn't even try to get out

She hated her pain, she wanted to die
I feel so angry and sad - she didn't even try!
And the ash it now falls like snow from the sky

__________________________________________

My past and my future have gone up in flame
My hope, my heart, my house, my dame

This life - what's left - this ash - it's my fate
I wanted to save her, but I was too late

This nightmare I wish was just a dream
If I could speak, or breathe, I'm sure I would scream

She was scared of the dark, so I held her at night
I comforted - told her things would be alright

I told her that Christmas would be quite a sight
Said we could go see trees all dusted in white
But only ash falls like snow tonight

__________________________________________

So Christmas is here - the cheer and the laughter
The reading of stories and happy ever after

At least I'm sure that's how some people feel
Far away from this fire, where pain seems unreal

When carols are sung, and stories are read
To me it all seems so empty and dead

The lights are so bright, the beauty of night
I hear someone saying things will be alright

Then I try to breathe, but the air is too dry
I hold on to hope, at least, I do try
But inside of my soul, I've started to die
There's nothing left in me - I can't even cry
And the ash like sweet snow still falls from the sky

.

Just Another Goat

Give me a torch and I'll burn the world down
But not until I rescue you
From this life of molten despair

You call it hope, and I call it pain
We'll meet in the middle
Someday when the puzzle pieces fall from the sky

The souls are crushed when truth rains down
Is there no hope?

And so signs off. . . just another lonely goat

Dealing With Negative Emotions [Gratitude]

"Say 'Thank You'"

We all try to "get rid of" pain and stress, "reduce" fear, and "fight" depression. I don't think this is best.

I've said before that I think we should instead calm fear, empathize with pain, give depression a hug, and negotiate with stress. Embrace each as being a part of you, and treat them gently.

But one thing I've learned more recently - after you've calmed one, and before you send it away, you should thank it. Thank stress for trying to help motivate you. Thank pain for helping you be connected with reality. Thank depression for helping you express how you really feel. Thank fear for caring and working to protect you.

And then sent it away... Let go of fear or pain, rather than holding on to it.

Peace is Deeper than Happiness

I just felt like writing a random and short blog. I haven't blogged in a couple weeks; I just haven't been in the mood. Writing is like that sometimes - it is an art. In any case, tonight I felt like writing a short blog about happiness. So, yeh, it's not the same style as my other most recent blogs.

Peace

Happiness is awesome. However, there is something more awesome than happiness. What could it be? I'll tell you! It's peace. I think that deep down, we each long for peace much more than for happiness. One can have peace without happiness, and as far as I've seen, it generally looks kinda like manic-depressive systoms. One moment, the person will be truly happy, but the instant that happiness wears off, there is no peace, and so the mood plummets to depression. Not fun. A person who does not have peace will often feel "driven," and many driven people are often happy, but never peaceful. Do we envy them? Of course not! In my opinion, it just kinda sucks to not have peace.

In Christ, do we all have peace? Yes and no. Insomuch as we "have Christ" we "have peace" for peace is found in Him. However, we often forget how to access that peace. Perhaps it's like that piece of jewelry that I put in a safe place, and then cannot find it years later. I own it, but don't know how to actually find it or put it to good use. In that way, even christian find themselves "without peace" in their lives, and like I said, that sucks. Life without peace is like a nightmare. Litterally. A nightmare has bad situations, sure, but what makes it so awful? In real life, when faced by those same situations, a person probably wouldn't get as worked up. What makes it so awful is the feeling of the nightmare: a feeling so terrifying that you may wake up in a cold sweat. Life without peace contains that same irrational and terrifying feeling. This is feeling that often causes insomnia, as far as I can tell, anyway.

Lyrics from Enter Sandman:

Sleep with one eye open
Gripping your pillow tight
Exit light enter night
Take my hand
Off to never never land
Something's wrong, shut the light
Heavy thoughts tonight
And they aren't of snow white
Dreams of war, dreams of liars
Dreams of dragon's fire
And of things that will bite

Mainly, I think that a lack of peace is connected to not feeling safe. You'll notice that I used the wording "feeling" instead of "thinking." People can consider themselves sad without actually feeling that sense of safety. Additionally, safety isn't just a physical thing, it's also deeply emotional. If a person feel physically safe, but emotionally in danger, they will not feel safe at all. So, if a person is emotionally and physically safe, why wouldn't they feel safe and calm? Generally, it's because either they never had that internal feeling of security to begin with, or else they lost it because of some traumatic experience(s). How can you feel safe if, on the inside, you are bleeding to death? If someone comes to your house and stabs you in the heart and leave, are you safe? No harm is coming to you, yet you do not feel safe because you are already harmed.

The other key aspect of peace that I know about is relationships. Babies learn their sense of safety from a mother, and those that don't develop patterns of fear in their lives. We sometimes chuckle at little kids who cry as if the world has come to an end about a dropped ice cream cone, and yet, why do we laugh? For that kid, the world really had come to an end, for they do not have the contextually information to realize that it has not, and more importantly, does not have the emotionally library to be able to access the feeling of comfort and security on their own. We, as adults, can access that information and those calming feelings (most of us anyway). Why should we laugh at those who cannot? This relational aspect must be much deeper than the safety aspect, though, from what I can tell. People who love their family will sometimes calmly and peacefully put themselves in the way of danger to protect their family. They do not feel freaked out by the danger, but count the costs and feel at peace with it. This is why martyrs throughout history have been able to die in peace because first of all, they know that eternally they are not in danger, but a more present feeling than that is the feeling of being near to Christ. Being and feeling near Him gives them that relational peace.

So, like I said before, a person can be happy without being actually peaceful. Happiness is not bad, in my opinion, but does not stand well alone. Many people who think they are seeking happiness are actually seeking peace, and joy is built off of true peace. Not having peace truly is a quite miserable state of existence, but is much harder to fix than a lack of happiness, for many things can make a person happy, but peace is often hard to come by. I think that most people who call themselves unhappy are more truly unpeaceful, and should strive hard to find that peace. Those who run after happiness usually need peace, and therefore people should generally not run about about after happiness, but after peace. When they have peace, they will realize that they don't need happiness, and after that, they will be able to enjoy a better sort of happiness: a truer joy, brightness, and richer enjoyment of everything. Many times, though, one must go through hell to find peace. This is because often some of smaller "hell" has separated us from that feeling of safety, trust, and love, and to get to those feelings we must first face, work through, and heal from all that stuff. Like third degree burns, the healing process for some things is more painful than the harm itself. We need peace, though, and it's worth it to go through "hell" to get it.